Get running girls, no time to slack
Don’t think of skulking at the back
If you think you can hide, you’re sadly wrong
‘Neath the eagle eye of Andrew Frimpong
To him your fitness is no joke
A gentle touch would make him choke
With exercise he’ll not let you flirt
His regime is cruel and it’s going to hurt!
Get running clockwise round the room
And do not let him see your gloom
This man just feeds right off your pain
He’ll up the reps the more you complain
The man who does one-armed press-ups with ease
Just loves to make you do burpees
The more you hurt, the more he grins
The more you scream, the more he wins
He takes no prisoners, that’s for sure
Your battle for fitness is his war
Like a sergeant on a parade ground
He loves to make you jump around
Press-ups, star jumps, squats and crunchies
You can take him chocolate for his munchies
But even choose his favourite flavour
You still won’t curry any favour
Lunges with weights on the bench
You should hear the way he maligns the French
But politically correct is not his style
At least he slags them off with a smile
And his methods work, no doubt of it
His victims now are pretty fit
So no wonder they’re feeling a bit of stress
What happens to them now is anyone’s guess
It really is quite a disgrace
Coz Andrew’s leaving Vintners Place
He’s legging it as fast as he can
To go and be a fireman
And though they thought that he was cruel
The pupils at his fitness school
Are now he’s going, getting crabby
They’re scared that they will end up flabby
They’ll be sad to see dear Andrew leave
If the truth were known I think they’ll grieve
So we hope in his new job he’ll do well
But remember those he put through hell
If going out and fighting a fire
Is not everything to which you aspire
You could always come back to see your chums
And help repair their saggy bums!
©Jo Wallen Ross
25th September 2009
